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William Shakespeare's Much Ado About Mean Girls

William Shakespeare's Much Ado About Mean Girls

Autor: Ian Doescher

Illustriert von: Kent Barton
2019 - Quirk Books


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A 2019 Goodreads Choice Awards Finalist

"Much Ado About Mean Girls reimagines Tina Fey's screenplay as an Elizabethan play. It's a tricky premise to get right, but Doescher hits the mark."-Paste

"Delightful."-Portland Tribune

"[William Shakespeare's Much Ado About Mean Girls] will delight with its depth."-Booklist

"If this first entry in the wider Pop Shakespeare universe is anything to go by, Doescher will be on bookshelves and in homes for many more years to come."-Manhattan Book Review

"When it comes to Doescher's ability to cleverly and faithfully convert our favorite movies into Shakespearean masterpieces, the limit doth not exist."-Geeks of Doom

Evanston, Illinois, in the New World.

Enter chorus.

CHORUS When audiences 'round the globe appear,
Desiring stories of a woman's fate,
Our playwright answereth the calling clear,
Preparing ample banquet for your plate.
This tale of lasses takes us unto school
With many shrewish girls and boyish asses,
Wherein they make mistakes and play the fool,
And learn hard lessons far beyond their classes.
To this fey story make I introduction-
Which shows us Cady Heron's youthful age-
Her narrative unfolds in our production
In these few hours upon our simple stage.
I, prologue-like, your humble patience pray,
Gently to hear, kindly to judge, our play.


At the Heron residence and North Shore High School.
Enter Cady Heron and her parents, Lady Heron and Sir Heron.

SIR H. Proceed, young Cady, to procure thy lunch,
And by the bite of it end woes and all.
There ne'er was situation so enflam'd
That by a meal was not made easier.
Within this bag shalt thou a dollar find,
With which thou mayst buy milk an thou dost wish.
Ask thou the bigger children where 'tis done
And, by my troth, they'll gladly give thee aid.

LADY H. Remember'st thou the number of thy home?
Take this along; I writ it for thy sake.
I prithee, place it in thy pocket safe-
If thou dost love me, thou wilt lose it not.
[ Aside:] I'll seem the fool I am not; Cady, strong,
Will be herself. [ To Cady:] Art thou prepar'd for school?

CADY E'en were I passing wise, like Seneca,
I'd not have readiness as on me falls.

SIR H. A picture ere thou leavest home I'll take,
That we, one day, recall this moment rare.
[They take a photograph together. Exeunt Lady and Sir Heron as Cady walks to school.

CADY 'Tis natural, methinks, that parents cry
Upon the day their child first goeth schoolward.
Perforce this is the case most typical
When children are a meagre five years old.
I am sixteen and was, until today,
School'd by my parents in our fam'ly home.
Good gentles, like a waiting, open book,
The content of your minds is plain to read:
"A homeschool'd child is th'utmost rarity,
An 'twere a freak one would in circus find."
Your minds, belike, imagine instances
When children taught at home are strange, indeed.
Enter child 1 above, on balcony.

CHILD 1 The spelling of the short word xylocarp-
A fruit that hath a husky, woody shell-
Is plain: X-Y-L-O-C-A-R-P.
[Exit Child 1.

CADY Or, mayhap, ye assume we hold a faith
Bizarre and dangerous in the extreme.

Enter child 2 above, on balcony.

CHILD 2 Upon the third day of creation, God
Hath made the Remington bolt-action rifle.
For "Lo," God said, "my people must have aught
With which to fight the mighty dinosaurs
And-ages hence-the homosexuals."
Amen say I, and all my family.
[Exit Child 2.

CADY Think not with prejudice upon my state,
For, truly, normal is my family.
Though, in this case, 'tis normal temper'd by
The occupation of my parents two:
They both are researching zoologists,
Who spent the last twelve years on Afric plains.
My parents did know more of snakes than sneakers,
More knowledge of the zebras than of Zen,
More happy near the lions than Detroit,
More calm upon safari than in Chrome.
My life was wonderful beyond compare,
As I did grow among the pleasant beasts
And ev'ry day enjoy'd the open air.
It was a joyful, satisfying life,
Until my mother earn'd a teaching post
At old Northwestern University,
Complete with tenure-forcing our return.
Farewell said I to Afric and its plains,
And bid hello to high school and its pains.
[She is nearly struck bya passing bus as she crosses a street.

Alas! I must be careful, by my troth-
Ne'er was a day in Africa so fraught.

Enter many student

Celebrate the 15th anniversary of Tina Fey's Mean Girls with this illustrated adaptation of the cult classic script, retold in Shakespearean verse by the best-selling author of William Shakespeare's Star Wars.

On Wednesdays we array ourselves in pink! Mean Girls gets an Elizabethan makeover in this totally fetch comedy of manners about North Shore High's queen bees, wannabes, misfits, and nerds. Written in the style of the Bard of Avon, William Shakespeare's Much Ado About Mean Girls tells the story of Cady Heron's rise from home-schooled jungle freak to one of the most popular girls in school. Every scene and line of dialogue from the iconic script is reimagined in authentic Shakespearean rhyme, meter and stage directions, complete with dramatic asides from Janis, Damian, Gretchen, and Karen. By the end, you'll be surprised that Shakespeare didn't pen this classic story of rivalries, betrayal, jealousy, obsession, and fastidious rule-making about when one can and cannot wear sweatpants.


Ian Doescher is the New York Times best-selling author of William Shakespeare's Star Wars® and the Pop Shakespeare series. He lives in Portland, Oregon, with his family. Visit him at IanDoescher.com.


Titel: William Shakespeare's Much Ado About Mean Girls
Untertitel:Illustriert von: Kent Barton
Verlag: Quirk Books
176 Seiten
203.20000 mm
ab 14 Jahre
ISBN-13: 978-1-68369-117-4


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